I have heard your heart, oh my child. You have
said in your heart, "If I put myself forward, I shall be flamed, yea even
flame-broiled, upon the newsgroups and the chat lines and even unto the
webpages shall I be flamed. Yea, and I shall be spammed, and even the
spammers, they will flame me.
Therefore I will not put myself forward, that I be not flamed, and I be
And I say unto thee my child, "Fat chance." For thou shall be flamed,
upon the newsgroups and the mailing lists and even unto the webpages
shall thou be flamed, whether thou is as silent as a lamb or runneth off
at the keyboard like Anitra Freeman. And if you have a mailbox
somewhere, you will have spam in it, for this is a law of the universe
equal to "ditches suck Camaros". And these things are why God has given
thee a delete key.
So put thy voice out into the world, and put thy heart out into the
world, and when they spam thee take, and eat, for this is meat for
parody; and when they flame thee, for whatever they flamest thee for, say
"Speakest thou more, for I have just now washed my hair, and it is not
yet dry upon my head."